It’s easy to develop a strong opinion on any situation. However, it’s hard to give accurate advice without knowing all the facts. Lots of controversies erupted after a bride banned kids and animals from her wedding, including service dogs. At first glance, this might seem like an awful idea, but there’s a lot more to it than meets the eye.
After explaining the entire situation on Reddit, the bride received lots of support from strangers. Surprisingly, many users agreed that the bride’s rules made sense, but it’s certainly a tricky situation. So, let’s look at all the details to better understand what happened.
Bride Bans Kids and Pets
A woman who will be getting married in 2023 banned kids and pets from her wedding. She made sure to add that service dogs are no exception, even though her sister has a service dog. Her sister’s dog is a Golden Retriever that her psychiatrist recommended for bipolar and depression. However, the woman’s fiancé is terrified of the breed.
“My fiancé was attacked by a golden retriever when he was 11. While it wasn’t physically severe, it did affect him mentally and he had to go to therapy to be comfortable around dogs. He is now fine around all dogs but golden retrievers,” the woman wrote.
So, she said her sister always visits them without the dog. If she is out with their mom, she usually doesn’t need her service dog. Yet, the woman mentioned in the comments that her sister sometimes goes to clubs without the dog too.
The woman’s fiancé has worked hard to overcome his fears, but his only encounter with the sister’s service dog didn’t go well. According to the woman’s post, her sister secretly brought the dog to him and held the dog toward him without letting him leave. Since then, he has been especially uncomfortable being near her dog.
Sister Fights Back
Even though the sister never brings the dog near the fiancé anymore, she was furious when she found out about the “no dogs” rule for the wedding. Weddings are much more overwhelming than small get-togethers, but the woman says her sister has had no problems going to crowded places without her dog before.
The woman’s parents are siding with her sister. They told her that if the dog can’t come, then neither can the sister. Her parents are also threatening not to come now, despite the woman trying to reason with everyone.
“Honestly we’re not that close and she was only coming as a guest, so I posed the idea that she come for a dinner with me individually before or after the wedding to celebrate. Now my parents are threatening to not come and claiming ADA laws against me,” the woman wrote. “I honestly think my fiancés comfort on our wedding is more important than my sister coming, and selfishly I want my fiancé’s focus and attention on me and our special day.”
The woman added that her brother is on her side because he doesn’t believe his sister needs a service dog, but the woman writing the post has no opinion on that matter. She reached out to Reddit for some advice to find out if she was the one in the wrong. She got an overwhelming number of responses.
The Community Responds
Of course, it’s impossible to know all the details without being involved in the situation, but many people shared respectful opinions about it. For the most part, people agreed that the woman was allowed to ban the service dog from the wedding. Since it’s a private event, they assumed that the ADA laws didn’t apply.
“Why do your sister’s psychological issues trump your fiance’s trauma at his own wedding? According to your post, she has visited you multiple times without her service dog, so it doesn’t seem like a stretch for her to be without her service dog for your wedding,” said one response. “If she absolutely feels that she cannot be without the dog for your wedding, then she can just not attend. Also, the ADA doesn’t apply here as attending a wedding is not a protected right.”
Several other comments also asked if the dog was a service dog or an emotional support dog (ESA). Based on the information given, many people thought that maybe the dog is an ESA, which doesn’t have the same rights as a service dog. However, others pointed out that it still doesn’t matter since it’s a private event for the bride and the groom.
Who is Right in this Situation?
In many situations, there isn’t a right or wrong, but instead, just different sides to the story. Yet, most people seemed to collectively agree that the bride can make whatever rules she wants. After all, she and her fiancé need to be at the wedding while other guests do not.
Service dogs are very important, but based on the woman’s story, the sister hasn’t been very respectful of the fiancé’s fears so far. However, one comment pointed out that the wedding is nearly two years from now, so a lot could change in that time. They suggested that the family should stop worrying about it now and revisit it once everyone has had a chance to calm down.
Some comments gave advice for how to help the husband work on his fears, but they said that it was just general advice that didn’t have anything to do with the wedding. Like all brides and grooms, this couple wants it to be a special day for both of them, so it seems like they will follow through with that even if their family members don’t agree. Hopefully one day they can all overcome this disagreement and learn to understand each other better than before.