Owning a Dogue de Bordeaux, or French Mastiff, can be likened to living with a gentle, yet somewhat slobbery, bear. Despite their formidable size and appearance, these dogs are known for their affectionate and loyal nature. But as any Dogue de Bordeaux owner will tell you, there are some unique challenges that come with this breed. Here are the top eight problems only a Dogue de Bordeaux owner would understand.
1. The Drool Dilemma
Much like their Mastiff cousins, Dogue de Bordeaux are expert droolers. They leave a trail of drool wherever they go, whether it’s on your freshly laundered clothes or the new sofa you just bought. When owning a Dogue de Bordeaux, you’ll quickly learn to have a ‘drool rag’ in every room and accept that drool is just part of your decor now.
2. The Snoring Symphony
Imagine a freight train passing through your living room every night. That’s what it’s like to live with a Dogue de Bordeaux and their snoring. The sound can range from a gentle hum to a full-blown brass band, often causing you to wonder how such a loud noise can come from one dog.
3. The Mighty Appetite
Dogue de Bordeaux, with their substantial size, have an appetite to match. Their capacity to inhale a bowl of food in mere seconds is nothing short of impressive. However, this also means you’ll need to keep your pantry stocked at all times and always hide the Thanksgiving turkey!
4. The Couch Potato Syndrome
Despite their intimidating size, Dogue de Bordeaux are surprisingly low energy. They enjoy their lounging time and are perfectly content to spend hours sprawled out on the couch, bed, or any available surface really. This often leaves owners trying to squeeze into a tiny corner of the couch, all while being squashed by their furry friend.
5. The Constant Shedding
Dogue de Bordeaux shed like it’s their job, and they’re really committed to it. Their short, fine hair can weave itself into your upholstery, carpet, and clothing. Investing in a powerful vacuum cleaner, and perhaps several lint rollers, is non-negotiable for any Dogue de Bordeaux owner.
6. The Lap Dog Delusion
Despite weighing up to 140 pounds, Dogue de Bordeaux are convinced they’re lap dogs. Be prepared for your gentle giant to climb onto your lap any chance they get. Comfort is a small price to pay for the privilege of being chosen as their preferred seating, right?
7. The Gas Attacks
Dogue de Bordeaux have a tendency to be… well, gassy. They are capable of releasing farts that could compete with a stink bomb. As an owner, you’ll quickly learn to brace yourself when your dog starts to look a little too comfortable.
8. The “I’m the Boss” Attitude
These dogs can be somewhat headstrong. Their stubborn nature often shines through when it’s time for a walk or training session. Patience is key when dealing with a Dogue de Bordeaux. Remember, they’re not being stubborn, they’re just encouraging you to see things from their perspective!
Living with a Dogue de Bordeaux is an experience like no other. You’ll need to dodge drool, endure the snoring symphony, and accept that your lap is their favorite seat. Despite all the quirks, the unconditional love and loyalty you receive from these gentle giants make it all worthwhile. Hats off to all Dogue de Bordeaux owners – you’re truly in a league of your own!
Toledo, United States.
