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If you’ve ever had a giant dog who thinks they’re lap-sized, you know the hilarious struggle. These gentle giants may weigh as much as a small human, but in their minds, they’re no bigger than a teacup poodle. Whether they’re sprawling across your lap, squeezing into tiny spaces, or demanding to be carried, they remain blissfully unaware of their true size. If you love a cuddly companion with an oversized frame and an even bigger heart, these massive lapdogs are the perfect snuggle buddies for you!
Great Dane
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Despite their towering height and heavyweight status, Great Danes are convinced they’re tiny cuddle buddies. These dogs often try to climb onto their owner’s lap, completely unaware that their long legs and massive bodies take up half the couch. They thrive on human affection and will press their entire weight against you like a needy toddler. Great Danes also have a habit of draping themselves over your lap, leaving you pinned under what feels like a furry boulder. But when those big, soulful eyes look up at you, it’s impossible to tell them no.
Newfoundland
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Newfoundlands are huge, fluffy, and absolutely convinced they belong in your lap. These sweet-natured dogs have the personality of a teddy bear and the body of a bear, period. They adore being close to their humans and will happily sprawl across your legs, completely unbothered by discomfort. Newfies are notorious for their “leaning” habit—when they lean their entire weight against you, you might find yourself tipping over. But with their affectionate nature and thick, snuggly fur, these giants make the best (and heaviest) cuddle partners.
Saint Bernard
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A Saint Bernard’s ideal spot is wherever you are—preferably sitting on you. These massive dogs may have been bred for mountain rescues, but they seem to believe their true calling is being a lapdog. Saint Bernards have a way of plopping down onto laps, crushing legs, and drooling over their chosen human. They love to rest their giant heads on you, making moving nearly impossible. While their weight can leave you breathless, their sweet and gentle nature makes them worth every squashed rib.
Bernese Mountain Dog
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Bernese Mountain Dogs are known for their affectionate nature and deep bond with their humans, often leading them to ignore personal space. These fluffy giants have a knack for curling up in laps despite their hefty size, acting as if they weigh a mere 10 pounds. They are happiest when glued to their owners, pressing their furry bodies against you with all the force of a freight train. Berners are also famous for flopping over onto their people, effectively turning you into a human mattress. A Bernese Mountain Dog is the perfect oversized lapdog if you love big, cozy snuggles.
Mastiff
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Mastiffs are walking tanks with the mindset of a lapdog. These gentle giants are notorious for trying to squeeze into tiny spaces or sit directly on their owners’ laps, completely unaware of their bulk. Mastiffs are also expert “leaners,” putting all their weight against their humans as a show of affection. If you don’t brace yourself, you might end up on the ground with a 200-pound cuddle bug crushing you. But despite their size, Mastiffs are some of the sweetest, most loving dogs you’ll ever meet—just don’t expect them to respect personal space.
Leonberger
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Leonbergers are massive, regal dogs who somehow believe they can fit into the tiniest spots. These fluffy giants are known for their affectionate and goofy personalities, often flopping into laps without warning. With their thick, luxurious coats, they make for excellent (and slightly overwhelming) cuddle buddies. Leonbergers also have a way of sitting directly on their owners, completely unbothered by the fact that their bulk is cutting off circulation. A Leonberger is a perfect choice if you want a dog that’s both majestic and completely clueless about its size.
Irish Wolfhound
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Irish Wolfhounds might be one of the tallest dog breeds in the world, but in their minds, they’re still small enough to fit in your lap. These lanky giants are incredibly affectionate and love curling up next to (or on top of) their humans. Wolfhounds have a way of stretching themselves out across furniture, taking up as much space as possible while still attempting to snuggle. They also love resting their heads on their owners, which feels adorable—until you realize their heads are the size of a bowling ball.
Great Pyrenees
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Great Pyrenees dogs are massive, fluffy, and 100% convinced they are lapdogs. These gentle guardians love being close to their humans and have no problem plopping their enormous bodies onto you. They also habitually nudge and push their way onto couches, beds, and laps, regardless of whether there’s space. Their thick coats make them extra cozy, but their sheer size means you’ll likely be buried under a mountain of fur. A Great Pyrenees is your perfect oversized cuddle buddy if you’re okay with being smothered in love (and fluff).
Kuvasz
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Kuvasz dogs are large, powerful working dogs with a surprisingly cuddly side. Despite their serious guardian instincts, they have a deep affection for their humans and often try climbing onto laps like tiny puppies. Kuvasz dogs also love pressing their full weight against their owners, leaving you feeling like you’ve been pinned by a furry avalanche. Their thick, white coats make them look like giant clouds, but once they settle onto your lap, you’ll quickly realize how heavy a cloud can be.
When Your Lapdog is Bigger Than Your Lap
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If you ever feel like you’re being slowly crushed under a pile of fur, congratulations—you own an oversized lapdog! These giant cuddle monsters might not understand personal space, but their love and devotion are unmatched. Sure, they might leave you with numb legs, aching ribs, and a little (or a lot) of drool, but who needs comfort when you have unconditional love? So, the next time your dog tries to fit into your lap, just embrace it—after all, you’re their favorite pillow, whether you like it or not!